Sex is pleasure and fun, but it is also a learning process in which we are going to learn to know our body and that of other people, what we like and what we don’t, what excites us and what cuts us off and, also, which They are the tastes and desires of our partner or couples.

Sex is never the same, so the learning process never ends. There are always new things to learn, especially the first times. Among the issues that tend to worry the most is that of duration. Is it normal to last a short time the first few times? Next, we answer this question and talk about how long sex should last.

How long should sex last?

Many people have concerns that they ejaculate too quickly the first time. To understand what’s fast, it’s good to have an idea of ​​how long intercourse should last, at least on average. Logically, the duration will be highly variable, for example, a factor to take into account is the foreplay, since these foreplay can greatly influence the duration, which is why the different investigations that have been carried out on the subject define sex as the moment in which penetration begins, without taking into account the preliminaries.

There are several investigations on what is the estimated duration of the sexual relationship, in this heterosexual case, from the beginning of vaginal penetration until the male ejaculation is reached. One of the most popular was carried out in 2005 and is based on a study of 500 couples over the age of 18 and from different parts of the world. It was published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine and determined that the average time for this ejaculation from the start of vaginal penetration was 5.4 minutes. But keep in mind that this average will vary depending on the previous stimulation, the position chosen or the ability to control ejaculation.

In addition, in the first few times it is common for it to last less. In any case, it is a time that only has to be taken as a reference. Each person and each relationship is different, so you don’t have to worry or feel bad if you last a little longer or a little less. The important thing is that you feel comfortable.

Is it normal to last a short time the first few times?

Yes, it is normal that the first time male ejaculation is rapid. The first few times, the usual thing is that we have little control over our body or that of our partner or partners and everything is new and requires time to explore. In addition, it is common to feel a lot of excitement. All of this may answer your question as to why I sometimes ejaculate quickly. The learning process to enjoy sex takes time and you have to learn to relax, concentrate and get the rhythm that each encounter needs. With time and experience it will get better and better!

How to delay ejaculation

Although, as we have explained, rapid male ejaculation is normal during the first sexual intercourse, there are some tips that you can apply to gradually gain control and delay the moment:

Masturbate to know your body

Masturbation is not just a way for you to orgasm alone. Practicing, you will discover when you are about to ejaculate so that you can gradually lower the intensity and thus delay ejaculation. In other words, consciously masturbate with the goal of learning to control your body and delay climax.

Change sexual position

It is a way to pause the encounter for a moment and regain control, looking for a position that is more comfortable for you to hold on a little longer without ejaculating. This short pause can also help you regain control and reduce a bit of over-arousal.

Focus on giving pleasure

Do not focus only on you and your pleasure. Direct your attention to pleasing the other person. In this sense, it is a good idea to dedicate time to the preliminary games, that is, all the caresses, kisses, etc., that you can do before penetration. This will increase your partner’s arousal and will help you reach orgasm.

Don’t just focus on sex

You can do the exercise of thinking about other things during the relationship to distract your attention if you feel that your arousal is too much and thus delay ejaculation as much as possible. This is one of the most used tricks to delay ejaculation because the brain is also a powerful sexual organ, and if you manage to control your thoughts and not focus only on what is exciting at the moment, you can delay the orgasm a bit.

Use delay condoms

Maybe you don’t know them, but among the offer of condoms you can find those that offer you the possibility of delaying male ejaculation. Try Durex Prolonged Pleasure, with a lubricant that contains 5% benzocaine, a substance that helps delay his ejaculation, and Durex Mutual Climax, which accelerates female orgasm, thanks to its relief of dots and grooves, while delaying the masculine thanks to its lubricant with 5% benzocaine.

Forget what you see in porn

Finally, you should know that pornographic movies create expectations around sex that do not match real life. For example, it is common to see in these movies that men are able to last a long time without ejaculating, doing a lot of positions and always with the maximum stimulation. But, as we have explained to you, this is not realistic and it is best that they do not become your role model.

Instead, focus on your own experiences, on enjoying yourself with your partner or partners and learning to get to know yourself and the other person to make each encounter the most pleasant.

Previous articlesexual positions for the first time
Next articleWhat are ribbed condoms for?