Hello, I have been encouraged to write because in this confinement I am alone at home and I would like to take advantage of it and be able to make the most of it.
I think that I have always had to work on sexuality and learn about it; It is my pending subject. I am sure that to be able to enjoy with someone I first have to achieve it with myself, so I ask to see if some advice would be possible to work and improve in this aspect. Thanks a lot.
This confinement has very hard aspects , such as health difficulties for many, the health and social situation, fear of contagion, loneliness , moments of anxiety and sadness, being locked up…
But from a bad situation we can always also draw positive aspects, as is the case with this petition. If we are confined alone, taking the opportunity to work on some personal aspect is a great objective.
If in this case we talk specifically about working to improve sexuality , I think the most important thing is to know what basic aspects we need to be clear about in order to enjoy a full and conscious sexuality.
Next, I present ten tips so that you can check if you have internalized them and if you apply them to your sexuality and, if not, you will already know where to start working to improve it.
1. Know your body
The first step to enjoy a good sexuality is to know the way through which you have sensations, and that is called the body. It is important that you know your corners, your nuances… Observe your body without judging it, just know it and discover it.
For this, it is good to look for a moment of tranquility, have a mirror at hand and begin to observe all the parts of your body, accept them and, above all, get to know the genital area in detail, the most forgotten, the most hidden. You should not be afraid to review it, it is part of you.
Solo sex at home.
2. Seek your own pleasure
Do you know what you like? To feel pleasure you must discover what makes you feel. Investigate what sensations you have, touch different parts, look for different ways to stimulate yourself . Pleasure depends on oneself, each one must take care of their pleasure, do you know how to get yours? I encourage you to go through your body from head to toe and identify those areas that you like to touch and how you like to caress them the most.
3. Accept yourself and love yourself
Your body, your arousal, your fantasies… everything is fine. She stops judging you, demanding you, and starts accepting and loving you. Every body is beautiful, every desire is beautiful (as long as others are respected).
This point is one of the most complex, the demand always appears and the idea that the body is ugly, or could be better, left over from here or there… In order to reach full sexuality, there must first be an acceptance of who you are and self- esteem .
4. Enhance your erotic self
Get the best version of yourself erotically speaking. Allow yourself time to foster your desire , to enhance your eroticism. Surely you dedicate a thousand minutes to many things, but few moments to your well-being. Eroticism, sexuality, is a basic aspect for your self-esteem.
Look for resources to discover that erotic self: sensual music , a smell, underwear , an erotic reading , a sensual video… It is good that you know how to work your desire and how to connect with your eroticism, because it is the basis for begin to enjoy a good sexuality.
An erotic book, underwear, music… There are many resources to enhance our eroticism.
5. Enjoy the journey, there is no end
What is the end? Where do you intend to go? In sex, the most important thing is the path, the journey, not reaching the climax means greater pleasure. Learn to discover the different pleasures and find the nuances in each sexual step.
6. Disconnect the mind and connect the body
Stop thinking, flow, feel, connect with what your body says and experience. There are no demands, there is no goal, just feel . Turn off your mind. It is not about having a blank mind, an aspect that is impossible to achieve, but you can get the mind to listen to the body, and if any thoughts appear, be erotic and focused on the moment you are living. On many occasions I recommend that you work on relaxation or mindfulness when it is difficult to turn off distracting thoughts.
7. Create your environment
Find the right environment to let yourself go. Create an environment that helps you connect with the erotic self, to disconnect your mind, to feel. It is an aspect that is little valued and one of the most important. Maybe a dimmer light, sensual or relaxing music, a comfortable bed, a smell…
8. Express yourself
Show what you feel and want, let yourself go. The self must be the center, not the other. Focus on yourself, but without demands. Learn to show yourself, to ask, to be spontaneous, to flow.
It is important that you know yourself and take responsibility for your own pleasure.
9. Stop Acting
Listen to yourself and don’t seek to be someone you’re not, don’t force yourself. Stop acting, showing yourself as required of us, of being that man or that woman who is always willing, who likes everything they do, who accepts what the other needs.
10. Eliminate shame, do not judge yourself
Stop feeling bad about what you do, about your body, about what the other expects of you. You are worth a lot and you are incredible, do not doubt it. Through acceptance and self-esteem you can enjoy sexuality 10.
